(no stars. zero.)
As an American Idol judge would do, let’s start with the positive… the acting was fine. As for every other aspect of this torturous, lame, and utterly disturbing piece of (pardon my language) shit, Antichrist is terrible. It’s so bad, and mind blowingly so, that I can’t possibly fathom how it was made. To start, the film begins with a porno style close up of insertion…that’s right…insertion. And if that had been the worst of it, it might have been able to be described as artful. However, over the next hour and half nothing of any substance comes from the actions of the story.
It really is about as offensive to the eyes as a film could be. I would rather watch a 24 hour loop of the most grisly horror scenes from Hostel and Saw then to watch another 2 minutes of this abortion. What the filmmakers were thinking is far beyond my knowledge and whatever symbolism they were trying to create is just wrong. You failed.
Here is the movie’s spoiler, its sucks all the way through. Unrelenting crap. Not even a single redeeming quality. Unless, you’re a sex crazed sadist without the slightest bit of dignity… then you might very well enjoy yourself.
Antichrist is not like many bad movies in the way that you can find some humor in its shortcomings. I had hoped the film was going to be a pretentious hipster nightmare but what it actually is, is a test of endurance. I forced myself to finish for the sole fact that I never wanted to see it again. I wasn’t looking for a redeeming quality because no surprise was going to erase the first 80 minutes.
I wish I could go into detail about some of the scenes and their advanced perversion but sitting here writing about it actually brings me to physical pain.
If you watch this movie, I will be mad at you. Andy the Movie Man has laid a solid warning. Don’t watch this shit.
